The Garage Sale Review

Documenting crap that people sell in their yards

The true value of a remote controlled deer head

quickcashcharlieHello you garage sale fiends! This weekend’s sales taught me a valuable lesson, and I’m going to share what I learned with you here because I think you might find it inspiring.

Lesson: It’s important to have patience, as well as to keep working toward your goal. And regardless of whether that goal is finding a good garage sale, or perhaps a less worthy objective like choosing to save your money and marriage by not filling your house with the rusted junk you buy in strangers’ yards, you need to remember to rise to the top, straight to the top, had the guts got the glory, went the distance, now I’m not going to stop, just a man and his will to survive.

Whoa, sorry, I blacked out and started typing the lyrics to “Eye of the Tiger.” Basically, what I’m trying to say is that since it’s still early in the year, there are some weekends, like this one, when there aren’t a lot of garage sales. And if you don’t persevere through tough times then you might miss out on a real diamond in the rough — like the last sale I went to this weekend, where I met Quick Cash Charlie and he told me the tale of his talking deer head. I’ll start at the beginning.

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The Wolf of Cherrywood Street

IMG_0800When I woke up on Saturday morning I clutched my skull. I regretted my life, my decisions and my drunken defiling of that sacred period of time called “Friday night.” Yep, you guessed it, gentle reader: hangover. I rocked back and forth in my bed as I massaged my throbbing cranium and thought something along the lines of Ouch. Should not have drank those drinks last night. And then I thought Of course! I know how to fix this hangover! I’ll go sift through the crap that people put out in their yards on Saturday mornings!

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The path to yard sale enlightenment

Is there room in your heart for a wind-up Elvis doll?

Is there room in your heart for a wind-up Elvis doll?

Ahoy thar, you junk junkies! Welcome to the newest edition of The Garage Sale Review – the blog that chronicles the deals Gillian Rhodes and myself, assisted by the navigationally-astute, bargain-sniffing wunderkind, Brendan Keifer, wrangle up as we cruise around Austin munching kolaches and digging through the crap that people put out in their yards to sell on Saturday morning. It’s tough out there on the open road, faithful reader, being relentlessly trailed by bloodthirsty garage sale sharks who would ship their own mother down the river for a few dollars off that BBQ grill that’s for sale over there on 35th and Avenue H. But someone’s got to do it or the tale of that haggle-torn BBQ grill would never be told. So sit your ass down, don’t touch anything because we haven’t washed it off yet, and check out what we found this week.

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